Open letter to me

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Dear me in the past,

I wouldn’t have reached what I am today without you.

To tell you the truth, I don’t have that kind of courage to face any challenges if not for your (or the other versions of you) constant urges to become better.

I don’t have that much grit to move on and spit on those faces that made me a shrinking violet in the past. I don’t have that kind of kindness to forgive and forget, nor do I have that kind of generosity that had gotten me for granted by others.

To tell you the truth, I just wanted to thank you.

Thank you, because you didn’t give up.

Thank you because you have the guts to act as if nothing happened.

Thank you because you possess that kindness and generosity to forgive and move on.

Thank you because you chose to be brave.

I cannot promise you that I will be better, because one way or another I will be caught in on some random shit and will be bawling out to the world God-knows-what.

I cannot promise that I will be more hard-assed because there will be times that I just wanted to screw things up.

I cannot promise to be more decisive because sometimes making decisions is hard.

One day I would also read this kind of letter that our future versions would also write, but I know we’ll just laugh at our stupidity and mistakes.

I’ll just try my best and not screw up so that I don’t have anything to regret about.

Sounds easy? Nah. It’ll be a tough adventure, but I know it’s one hell of a ride. Because you and I, we’re in this for the long haul. 😂

Love,
Your present self

Footnotes:

I just turned twenty-one, so I wrote this while I’m mulling over my past f*ckups and future plans. Photo not mine.

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